Are You Looking Back?

People who feel they have been damaged or hurt by how they were treated in the past, either by family or by others, often live in isolation and try to keep other people at an arm’s length distance emotionally. They are reluctant to share their fears, hopes, dreams, wishes, and vulnerabilities with others. In other words, to share that most sacred part of themselves. The opposite can also be quite true by opening up and sharing far too much, far too soon in a relationship. There is a balance between relating and over-relating. If you have been hurt there is a crucial need for emotional and spiritual healing especially if this occurred in your fundamental relationships. If you don’t face the demons from your past, you cannot live in an emotionally healthy way in the present and future. No matter your faith, tradition, or culture there is a higher power and if you believe in the ability of God to intervene in your life, you will experience healing and be comforted. Many people live with the burden of their past and they just don’t know how to let go of it. They literally need someone to come in and cut that rope and say, “Let go of it.” Moving on with God’s help means you can begin to make a big difference in learning to be open to others again. In Scripture the story of Lot is somewhat instructive in dealing with the past. Lot was Abram’s nephew (Abram’s name was not changed to Abraham until God made the second covenant with him regarding becoming the father of a host of nations) and Abram took Lot with him as he set out for the land of Canaan. As they were traveling in stages toward Bethel it became clear that the land they were on could not support both Lot and Abraham’s possessions and there were quarrels between the herdsman of Abram’s livestock and those of Lot’s. Lot then was offered to go either right or left and Abram said he would choose the opposite direction. Lot ultimately settled among the cities on the plain of Jordan, pitching his tents near the city of Sodom. Lot and his family were surrounded by evil and two angels protected him and his daughters from the evil intentions of the townspeople. Lot was urged immediately to take his wife and daughters and leave Sodom. Lot’s son-in-laws thought he was joking. Lot fled but his wife looked back and was turned to a pillar of salt. What is instructive in all of this is that we can spend a lot of energy looking back in life and if we are not careful we will miss what is happening in the moment and miss out on the future. If you need psychological and spiritual healing, the first step is to admit that need and let someone wise into the most sacred part of yourself where you will share your fears, hopes, dreams, wishes, and vulnerabilities. If you or someone you know may need counseling, please contact Lamar Hunt Jr. or see his website at